November 12th, 2019

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NO SHOW CONFESSION

The following letter comes from one of my readers who wishes only to be identified as “Bob”.

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Dear Mr. ValleyScott,
Thank you for your blog. Reading it has been really insightful about many things. Your honesty has inspired me to want to be honest about a problem I have. Please share this on your blog if you can.

I have a confession to make. I am a “no-show”. I am the king of no-shows. I have a serious problem.

I have been hobbying for 7 years. In that time I have had 118 sessions with 56 ladies. This does not include 30 trips to AMPs. But that is not my problem. My problem is that I have also been a no-show 364 times.

Your read that right—364 times.

I am one of those guys that makes the women mad. I know it, and I am ashamed of it.

I suffer from a social-anxiety disorder. I have all my life. I was the kid in school who sat alone and didn’t talk to anyone. When I found the Internet I thought I had found salvation. I could communicate without talking to people. Texting is also great. That is how I make contact with every woman. But then I know I have to actually meet them. And 75.5% of the time I can’t do it. And that doesn’t count all the women that I started contacted and then never set a date with.

I just can’t. I make the appointment, I get in my car, and I drive to their location. And then I just drive right past. Or I park in the parking lot and just sit there. And if I can’t get the nerve to text them that I have arrived, I end up just sitting for a while before leaving. When the women text me to see where I am I just can’t respond. If I did they would realize what a coward I am.

Sometimes I can get up the nerve to go. 216 times. Most of those were just one time. And many of those sessions ended with me leaving early.

I get a lot of angry text messages and emails from women. I understand that. They are angry because I have wasted their time. I feel bad about that. But I am too scared to respond. I am too scared to tell them why. I doubt they would believe me. I doubt they would understand that I was outside their hotel, sitting in my car, shaking with fear. That I couldn’t even hold my phone because my hands are shaking too much.

The women who have met me have seen me shaking. Sometimes I can’t even get my clothes off.

A few ladies have been very kind to me. They have helped me through my anxiety and fear. I have repeated with several of them over the years. It gets easier for me when I have met a woman before. I relax a little. But I am still very anxious. Sometimes I can’t perform, even if I have been with a lady before. Some ladies take pity on my for that, but others have become tired of it. They ask me not to see them anymore.

I have never shared this with anyone before. Please don’t give out my name or email. Just call me “Bob”.

To all the ladies that I have not shown up to see:
I am so, so sorry. I am sorry that I cannot overcome my anxiety most of the time. It is not your fault. This is a real problem I have. If it wasn’t for working online I wouldn’t even be able to keep a job. But that is still no excuse for what I have done. I have wasted your time to often. It is my curse. I hope you might forgive me, but I understand if you can’t. Being a no-show is one of the worst sins a hobbyist can commit, and I am guilty of it more than anyone. I sincerely apologize to every woman out there.

Mr. ValleyScott, thank you for giving me the chance to charge my story.

Sincerely,
“Bob”

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I want to applaud “Bob” for being honest and confessing to his “sins” here. That cannot have been easy for him. I must admit, I am shocked that a man can no-show that many times and still keep trying.

I don’t know what causes his social anxiety issue, but it must be pretty bad. I feel sorry for him.

I will not reveal any information to anyone about “Bob”. I will respect his privacy. I do hope that others will not judge him to harshly. And I hope that he learns to cancel appointments instead of being a no-show. Thank you for sharing your story, “Bob”.